ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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