He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
