Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
