Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
