Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
