Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
