spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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