When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize