I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Randomize
