that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
