I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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