Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
