I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
