My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
You are a genius and a whore.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
