She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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