that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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