Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
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