This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
