So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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