I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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