Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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