I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
