come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i already hear my dad disowning me
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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