I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize