I heard we made out
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I deserve this hangover.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
