yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I just found puke in my bra..
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
