please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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