The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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