So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
