I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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