I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Randomize