You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize