He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
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