Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
