just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
