Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
