That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
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