Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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