HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Shame - the story of my life.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize