Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
