I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize