she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
you told grandpa to call you daddy
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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