I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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