I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
