Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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