i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
he just fucked me for my cheese..
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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