Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(216): View more from Ohio

ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?

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(281): View more from Texas

Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno

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(647): View more from Ontario

Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

And to think..we used to do everything sober...

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(443): View more from Maryland

yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism

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(303): View more from Colorado

Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.

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(571): View more from Virginia

He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.

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(914): View more from New York

There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier

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