think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize