I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
NoShamevember. You game?
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
