So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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