Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
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